Welcome, visitors, to two days before the day after tomorrow.
Please listen to our theme
song. It is brilliantly performed for us by none other than Alfalfa himself.
Yes, it's happened. After smoking the sacred plant, Alfalfa, the divine
feminine, Eris, channeled through my pineal gland, graciously revealed
to the world her truest religion. (Okay, okay, so it's not actually
a religion.) Anyway, get in on the ground floor now before our blessings become
much, much more expensive.
This Spanky, er, spanking new faith, soon to feature multilevel
marketing and really cool-looking gold-colored stars for bringing
in brainwashed converts under your downline, will shamelessly
promote my own continually changing interpretations (on the fly) of
everything (yes, everything
without exception). Its motto is, "If you don't like the theology
today, try again tomorrow."
The Center for Alfalfa™
(CA, which is pronounced like "car" in Boston) is a cabal, or faction,
of Discordianism.
Though an extremely dangerous cult, I am fortunately both its episkopos
(Greek, overseer) and sole surviving congregant. Henceforth, my spiritual
connections, enumerated further down this page, will constitute the
chaotic and ridiculously superstitious mythologies of the creed.
The twin rabidly fundamentalist, yet disquieting, precepts of CA,
deliriously deconstructing metanarratives (whatever they happen to be) and whimsically
constructing new ones, are encompassed by Unities of All Things™. I refer you to
Unities of All Things™
for more bewildering and semi-useless information.
Hail Eris! All Hail Discordia!